Personality Plus: How to Understand Others by Understanding Yourself by Littauer Florence

Author:Littauer, Florence [Littauer, Florence]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Publisher: Revell
Published: 1992-06-30T22:00:00+00:00

Solution 2: Don’t Look for Trouble

Perfect Melancholies tend to take everything too personally, and they frequently look for trouble. One girl told me, “My husband is so negative, if we go to see a bad movie, he makes me feel like I produced it.”

Perfect Melancholies have particularly hard times with Popular Sanguine /Powerful Cholerics because they blurt out whatever goes through their minds without thinking of the consequences. Because Perfect Melancholy has preplanned each statement, he assumes others have also, and therefore, he reads into each casual comment a deep, hidden meaning.

As you Perfect Melancholies begin to understand the different temperaments, a big weight will be lifted from you. You will realize, perhaps for the first time, that the Popular Sanguine/Powerful Cholerics are not out to get you. They haven’t given you that much thought, and they surely have not planned ahead. As you learn to evaluate others by their set of temperament traits (and not by your own), you will have a whole new outlook on people. You can smile at each passing person, and stop looking for trouble.

Perfect Melancholies often feel left out and wonder why they are not invited to social events; and yet, when approached, they frequently turn people off with their negative responses. One day we asked such a woman to come to a party at our home. Instead of showing any enthusiasm, she replied, “Well, I’ll be out all day and won’t accomplish a thing, so I guess I might as well blow the whole night too.”

Sometimes a Perfect Melancholy can take a positive situation and turn it into a negative. The last time I went to the hairdresser, he sighed as soon as I sat down, and said, “Your daughter is sure giving me trouble.” I assumed Marita must have been late for an appointment, and I asked, “What has she done wrong?” He replied, “She keeps sending me new customers. She’s sent me at least ten new ones this month, and what’s worse, they like me and keep coming back!”

A friend gave me this list she found on her grandmother’s dresser:

JEAN HASN’T SENT ME A CHRISTMAS CARD IN TWO YEARS

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